Spamtards as a Source of Humor

Anyone who has a blog deals with spam comments. Wiki says:

Spam in blogs (also called simply blog spam or comment spam; note blogspam has another, more common meaning, namely the post of a blogger who creates no-value added posts to submit them to other sites) is a form of spamdexing. It is done by automatically posting random comments or promoting commercial services to blogs, wikis, guestbooks, or other publicly accessible online discussion boards. Any web application that accepts and displays hyperlinks submitted by visitors may be a target.

Adding links that point to the spammer’s web site artificially increases the site’s search engine ranking. An increased ranking often results in the spammer’s commercial site being listed ahead of other sites for certain searches, increasing the number of potential visitors and paying customers.

So that explains why the spamtards (  Some of my Yankee friends us the word F@#$&tard to describe an incredibly inept, stupid “F”up. Spamtard is sorta like that)   do it.  Here is what happened recently.  I got what I thought was a spam comment about one of my Wilson Amplifier posts.  Since I wrote about 20,000 original words about my Extreme Internet Setup,  the Search Engines love me.  The comment was a seemingly innocuous statement that agreed with my post and it was posted by a Wilson Electronics dealer; it also had a URL  embedded in the comment.  That set off the alarms and I went to the dealer’s website and challenged him as to why he was a spamtard and spamming my blog. he might’ve been a Yankee ’cause he never even asked what a spamtard was.

I got a very gracious and well written email back from the owner of the company.  He said they had recently hired an individual off of one of those freelancer websites that promised to increase their exposure and their rankings in the search engines.   I had done my homework and here is what I sent back  to him ( I will refer to him as Wilson Guy):

Indian Sweatshop

• The only way to increase your search engine results is through original content. You website is nothing but product info copied from the Wilson corporate site. Don’t expect miracles unless you put the work in. Writing original copy is tough work.
• Your “expert” is located in India.  I got that because the ISP is listed in the comment.
• Your “expert”  evidently Googled “Wilson cellular amplifiers”  and then  spammed the top 50 results that Google returned.
• A search on your experts Gmail address showed he has done this many hundreds of times for a variety of  different subjects.  Gmail is the haven for scoundrels and thieves and always sets me on alert.

Wilson Guy sent me an email back and said the “expert” had been sent packing and he was very apologetic to the point of offering me a substantial discount on any future Wilson purchases.

All the spam comments listed below are actual ones I have received here.

Spam comments are usually very generic –Spamtards are stupid and smart at the same time.

I love this blog

I don’t usually comment on blog posts but I needed to drop in and say thanks for posting this, I fully agree and with some luck other people will see your argument.

See, very generic and they could apply to any post subject. The humor comes in when the English as a second language thing kicks in or they just don’t really understand WTF they are talking about.

Sometimes different people have assignments to perform the written essays about this good post. But a lot of them are not very good essays writers. Thence, what should they do in this case? I instantly propose to buy essay from the online writing services.

OR

Genial fill someone in on and this fill someone in on helped me alot in my college assignement. Thanks you for your information.

But the real corkers go like this:

Will it be alright to use on sensitive teeth?

OR

Nice website. Great read.-By the way, if you get a moment, check out my Cross Dressing Website

OR

Oh my god you will not belief this. Our stupid puppy simply just farted on my arm!? I mean what is the problem with this!? I give food to that thing and I get this in return. I still can not belief that. Anyway, you have quite a few useful facts there in your posting. I knew Yahoo are going to take me to some useful stuff today . Ok need to hunt this pet now! Have a good evening you all!

Which may or may not be related to a comment received the previous day…

This is a bit off topic. We as Dog owners, have we ever thought about how much dog waste is being sent to the landfills? Use flushable dog poop bags. EPA recommends flushing dog waste as the best method of disposal.

I can’t make this stuff up- Good thing I have a good spam filter catching this crap and I can deal with it when I want a laugh.

End Note: Barbie Doll by Jack Ingram from the Unleashed Live album. Back in the day when Jack was still doing the Texas dancehall circuit and hadn’t heard the siren song from Trashville.

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