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The Puckerbrush Irregular Vol. 6-17

Activity Preview for the Secret Hideout

I am riggin’ down for 2 weeks of off time at the Secret Hideout.  That will amount to 162 days 24/7 without a day off. That is not a personal record; nor even close but as I get older I try to work smarter – not harder.

With that thought still fresh, you got fair warning the posts for the next two weeks may be variable.  I don’t tote the laptop out to the Church Smoker when it is operational and I don’t type worth a damn with a cold beer in my fist.   One upgrade at the Secret Hideout I am looking forward to is the presence of grid power.   Boondocking off-grid at the Hideout  was phenomenal practice and invaluable experience but a Texas Summer with no AC  is nearly intolerable and a tad too hardscrabble for me.  Rent due for the electric luxury will be bartered with output from the Church Smoker.

Timeoff agenda

  • The Church Smoker –  Demand for product is pretty high and that is satisfying.  I will be feeding 15+ at My Bro’s 60th Birthday Hoorah.  I also intend to fill both mine and My Bro’s freezer with barbecue products.  My FoodSaver Vacuum Sealing System is one piece of equipment I cannot do without so much so that a NIB spare is kept in storage.  From my own experience a brisket will keep for upwards of a year, pulled pork shoulder for 6 months or better and chicken for 3-4 months easy. The Foodsaver is one of the reasons I can routinely go 60 days without a supply run.
  • Cold Beer – self-explanatory
  • The NO Princess Palace  has proved to be a so-so match for the extremes of the puckerbrush.  I have replaced every single component of the RV since it was acquired in 2014.  Got a leaking water line right now that is a pesky bother.  I ventured under there a few weeks back and there were so many black widow spiders in residence I decided to let ‘er leak.  Maybe the 275 mile road trip to the Hideout will blow some of those bastards out into the road ditch.  Gonna find out.
  • The Dometic 2652 RV fridge vomited out its’ ammonia December 2016 and I have been getting by with the house fridge and chest freezer.  I got a plan to replace that POS Dometic with as many as two more better alternatives. Stay tuned.
  • Vela Von is a big girl at 20 months old and she should have been spayed already.  The logistics or running a single gate and getting the surgery done were just not possible.  I plan on getting this done in between smoker duty.
  • Mas cervezas frios – autoexplicativo

**************

 

You check in enough trucks on an oilfield gate and you are bound to get some characters.  As long as they got valid ID and don’t speed I try not to remark on appearance or actions.  But sometimes…….

I have had construction going on here for the last 10 days and one of the guys puzzles me.  He is probably in his 40’s and judging by appearance he is eat up with Harley Davidson.  Harley do-rag, skull and HD rings on his fingers, ear jewelry and even sunglasses with the HD logo on the ear pieces. You know, I get the dressing up like a part-time pirate on the weekends and stuff when you roll that Hog outta the garage. But every day?  And at work in the oilpatch? Mark Twain said “Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates.”  Maybe that is his deal,  I dunno.

 

**************

Summer 2015 at the Hideout

Had a guy come in delivering a big excavator back to the construction.  Vela Von is still doing her training and goes out with me every single time I work a truck.  It is good for a dog.  So the guy drops off the excavator and when he comes back out he motions me over to the driver’s door.

“That is a good lookin’ dog.” he says and then he proceeds to tell me this story.

‘I had a German Shepherd a few years back and she stayed out in the backyard quite a bit that was enclosed by a 6’ chain link fence.  My neighbor lady across the fence was an old biddy who knew all the gossip for four square blocks and she was not shy about getting up in your business.

She had a big white pet rabbit she kept in a hutch back there and part of the time she let it roam the back yard.  That rabbit drove my German Shepherd nuts whenever it was outside;  she just could not resist paying it WAY too much attention.  I was always afraid she would get through that fence and at that rabbit.

I woke up one Tuesday morning and went to the back door because the dog was scratching on it and when I opened it, there she was with a dirty, muddy, DEAD white rabbit at her feet.  I am like ‘Oh shit!!!!!! what am I gonna do now??’  It was still way dark outside so I grabbed that dead rabbit and washed it off clean in the laundry sink and blow dried it.  Then I snuck it back into the hutch thinking maybe the old biddy would assume it just died natural.

The Church Smoker fully deployed.

One evening a couple of days later I was out back and the old biddy comes up to my fence and says ‘Did you know my rabbit is dead?’ Immediately I threw up my hands and said ‘It wasn’t my dog! I SWEAR!!’  Then she says ‘Of course it wasn’t!  The rabbit died on Sunday and we buried it and then on Tuesday is was back in the hutch all nice and clean. My husband thinks it was some sort of divine rabbit resurrection.  Don’t that just beat all?’

I laughed because I never saw that ending coming and I liked it so much I even repeated it to BFF Cait but then I got to thinkin’…..

So I went to Snopes and sure ’nuff the  Dog and Rabbit Story is an urban myth and damn  near old as Snopes itself.  It sorta kinda perturbed me I fell for it like  a country rube.  Even so, it was a good yarn and I would have made one small change.  I may repeat it in the future but the difference is gonna be it was my cousin’s dog or somethin’ – that way it is not an out and out lie and I will not be assuming you are some sorta intellectual mosquito.

But then again………  As you well know from reading here I embellish or stretch the truth at times. After all, each and every one of my EXes looked like Raquel Welch, cooked like Rachel Ray and kept house like June Cleaver.  Most likely it was my boyish good looks and did you know I been contacted to play Jeff Bridge’s stand in for his sequel to Hell and High Water ( one of my all time faves) titled “Gate Guard Vigilante”?

Ummm yeah,  that’s the ticket.

End Note:  Outlaw State of Mind by Chris Stapleton from the Hell and High Water soundtrack. I was a major fanboy of Stapleton when he fronted The Steeldrivers and I liked his first solo album OK. He has a new one out called From a Room Vol 1. BFF Cait is diggin’ it.  I am not a fan because it stinks of Trashville sell-out.

Case in point- the recent CMA awards opener that ripped off the death of Gregg Allman for commercial gain.  Those folks shoulda been charged with music felony.

Even so this is a kick-ass recent Stapleton offering…….

And then this with The Steeldrivers  from 2008 which always gives me chicken skin.  Sublime artistry, simplicity and substance. I know which one does it better for me.

 

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The Puckerbrush Irregular Vol. 6-17, 9.8 out of 10 based on 18 ratings
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5 comments to The Puckerbrush Irregular Vol. 6-17

  • edgar

    I agree with you on the Foodsaver. Having rarely been to the store, you may not be aware that HEB carries large Foodsaver bags that an entire brisket will fit in.

    Love the blog and your opinion is spot on.

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  • Mike

    Enjoy your downtime, you have certainly earned it.

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  • Paul Dahl

    Hope no ghostly white rabbits follow you to the secret hideout… :cD

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  • Byron

    Andy,

    Have a great time and enjoy every minute! Some people think BBQ is easy peasey but I know better. At the same time I enjoy it and have seen others enjoy preparing mouth watering meals that please most all at gatherings. Something about taking the time to ‘do it right” makes it that much more satisfying. Hopefully it won’t be super hot weather but I bet you might be doing some of your artistic work while the sun is below the horizon and be careful then too. I have heard some tall tales during these marathon sessions. Have fun and know your followers will be conjuring up some adventures in their minds about your well deserved time off!

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  • Vince Emery

    Morning Andy,
    162+ days??!!! Damn, I’d say you’re past due for some down time. Enjoy every day of it.
    Funny story about the white rabbit. First thing came to mind when I seen ‘white rabbit’ was
    “Call Alice…..”.

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